Three audio stories from a couple’s experience of family, work, health, and homelessness

These stories are from the Invisible Project, a collaboration between the Welcome Project and Porter County Coalition for Affordable Housing, Housing Opportunities, Gabriel’s Horn, Dayspring Women’s Center, and Porter County Museum.

Note: Tracks can be listened to individually and do not need to be listened to in order.

Transcript for Seeking Some Level of Normalcy

Transcript for Tailspin

Transcript for We Were Them

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Seeking Some Level of Normalcy

“Just because you’re homeless doesn’t mean you have to surrender humanity.”
This story is from the Invisible Project, a collaboration between the Welcome Project and Porter County Coalition for Affordable Housing, Housing Opportunities, Gabriel’s Horn, Dayspring Women’s Center, and Porter County Museum.

Speaker 1: It’s about, I think, a lot about pride. Nobody wants to be seen as someone who can’t make it on their own. We’re all human beings, and we all have the same strengths and weaknesses within ourselves, so you just have to be willing to look at yourself and acknowledge that, and say, ‘I can’t do this alone.’

Speaker 2: We would sometimes sit in a parking lot in our vehicle at night and just talk all night long like, you know, ‘Where are we going to go? What are we going to do?’ And it’s like, well, we didn’t know that there was anybody out there that was willing to help us.

S1: I think we were always seeking some, some level of normalcy, you know? Finding opportunities to be—to look like everybody else, you know? You don’t want people to see what’s going on.

S2: During the day, we would spend a lot of time at the parks here in Valparaiso and Lake Station—they have a nice Riverview Park—but most of the parks at ten p.m. close up. Yeah, you’re constantly moving from place to place. Lot of times on hot days, we would spend our days at the library—

S1: Air conditioning.

S2: —you know, where they had air conditioning and a bathroom facility there.

S1: And we both loved to read.

S2: Yeah, we both loved to read. Yeah, nighttime was the worst. And, of course, you know, you don’t really have that many belongings, but, you know, what you do have, I mean, you know, you’ve got everything crammed in your vehicle, and, you know, even sleeping a lot of times — we would park out away from kind of the store, because, you know, we didn’t want to, you know, interfere—

S1: Be in the way.

S2:—we didn’t want to be in the way. You know, and then sometimes it’s hard to sleep because you know, you’re just not sure of your surroundings, and you don’t really feel that safe. And during that time, I think that’s most of our resources were making sure, you know, we have gas in the vehicle so we can move if we have to, we have food to eat, which was difficult with no cooking facilities. Everything had to be pre-prepared, and, of course, you know, that’s more costly, too. Hygiene. For me, that was the worst part. Restroom facilities, and hygiene. Of course, it was summertime when we were homeless, which, I think, we were fortunate because we could go up to the park, and we could go swimming, and we kept lots of empty gallon jugs—

S1: We would help each other.

S2: —and we would fill them, fill them with water. And like I said, it was summertime, so it wasn’t so bad, you know, having to wash your hair with cold water, but—

S1: I’d get to dump a bucket of water over her head.

S2: Right, you know? And, yeah, we would kind of go to the park in a secluded area, and we would, you know, like bathe each other, and watch and make sure nobody was coming, you know, so we could, you know, help each other do that. And, uh…

S1: Just because you’re homeless doesn’t mean you have to surrender humanity.

Tailspin

“Her income changed just the slightest bit and… it just kicked the underpinnings right out from under us.”
This story is from the Invisible Project, a collaboration between the Welcome Project and Porter County Coalition for Affordable Housing, Housing Opportunities, Gabriel’s Horn, Dayspring Women’s Center, and Porter County Museum.

Speaker 1: When we first came back to Indiana, we went to his sister’s, and she let us stay with her for a little while.

Speaker 2: And we got a place.

S1: And we both got a job, and from there, everything seemed like it was going pretty good. And we had been here four years when his sister passed away. And so…

S2: And that was, like, the final straw for me. I was broke.

S1: I was working. My hours got cut. Mitch had developed a lot of physical limitations, and his depression was, like I said, still there–underlying, but started coming out a little bit more when he wasn’t able to work, and that kind of threw us in the position where we became homeless.

S2: Bit of a tailspin. It was just, in a very short time, we went from like, being level, and then her income changed just the slightest bit, and that–that was it. It just kicked the underpinnings right out from under us.

S1: Right. When you’re living, like I said, paycheck to paycheck, you know, by the time it would get two or three days before payday, and, you know, I wouldn’t have a penny in my pocket. And when, you know, my hours started getting cut due to the economy–you know, business wasn’t as good–I was working at a restaurant, you know. It’s like, I’m driving eighteen miles one way to get to work, and eighteen miles back. Well, that’s, you know, taking a lot of gas–I need something closer to home. Due to my age, people kind of were more looking at me not as an asset, but as a risk. “Wow,” you know, “She’s not gonna be somebody long term. She may develop health issues. She may call off work. We don’t know what’s gonna go on.” And I think that was where I started having difficulties finding employment. So, when we couldn’t pay our lot rent, they, you know, basically–you have fifteen days to either pay or evacuate. And not having any immediate family or anybody that could help us, or provide a place for us to stay–you know, our children were in Wisconsin, and neither one of them was really in a position to do anything for us. It was kind of a snowball effect. We did live in our vehicle for approximately four months before one of my coworkers had told me about Housing Opportunities. We checked into that, and took us about another month, and they accepted us into their program, and provided us with a place to stay.

We Were Them

“Wow, it happened to me, it could happen to anybody.”
This story is from the Invisible Project, a collaboration between the Welcome Project and Porter County Coalition for Affordable Housing, Housing Opportunities, Gabriel’s Horn, Dayspring Women’s Center, and Porter County Museum.

Speaker 1: What we’re doing here is very outside our comfort zone.

Speaker 2: Yes.

S1: And that’s one of the things we are trying to do different. Because people need to learn these things. It’s not easy for people to open up about this sort of thing. Trust—it doesn’t come easy to me.

S2: It is, it’s very hard to know who you can talk to, and who you can be honest with, because a lot of people in my past— my experiences were, that the more people know about you, the more judgmental they become. Asking for help wasn’t something that I ever really did. That, for both of us, was a big step — having to ask for help.

S1: When we were living out of our vehicle, necessity drove us to have to go here and go there, because, you know, you don’t have resources, you know. We would park in the Walmart parking lot through the night for sleeping, because we knew they had restroom facilities we could use. And when you live like that, you start meeting other people in a similar circumstance. And I was astounded at the number of people with vehicles and such, so I mean, typically if you saw them, you wouldn’t even know that they’re suffering in this way. And they’re all around us. We were them, you know, and I never understood any of this. But I got a pretty good grasp of it now.

S2: I don’t think I ever even really considered people being homeless. It wasn’t anything that I ever thought about, you know. I wasn’t a person who was going to be like,‘Oh, there’s homeless people out there. I should do something to try to help them,’ because the thought never even crossed my mind. And then, when it happens to someone like us, where then I have to take a step back and say, ‘Wow, it happened to me. It can happen to anybody.’ Because I would’ve never in a million years dreamed that I would end up homeless.

S1: What I’ve learned is that life is not a straight line. There’s curves, turns, and you even go back upon yourself many times. And it’s easy to get lost, you know, to take one misstep, to take one wrong turn: left, when you should’ve went right. And, so, to stereotype all these people, and say they’re this, this, or this — I can’t tell you how wrong that is. Bad things happen to good people, and it ain’t through no fault of their own. It’s life. And I’ll never hesitate to help somebody up after this.